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Reasons 'Straight' Men Hook Up With Guys
Reasons 'Straight' Men Hook Up With Guys We’ve all had least one sexual experience where we’ve hooked up with a self-identified “straight” man. While I’m unbelievably hesitant these men “straight” instead of closeted gay or bisexual, I believe there can be some reasons why self-identified “straight” men do have sexual relationships with other men. Frankly, I’m not exactly sure if means these men are or aren’t straight. While one of the the biggest factors of sexuality is the physical sexual acts we engage in, identity is more complicated than whom we screw, and our actions are only one factor contributes our sexual identity. But on the other hand, as someone who is bisexual (and claimed being straight while hooking up with men 5 years), I also know the power of self-deception, deep-rooted internalized homophobia/biphobia, confusion, and the fear of using the labels “bisexual” and “gay.” All of said, here are reasons self-identified “straight” men hook up with other guys. They like attention Gay men are flatterers. We whisper sweet nothings. We say how attractive you are, and we say it all men, regardless of sexual orientation. Some straight men love the compliments, love the attention, and love the feeling of being wanted badly, they hook up with other guys even though they’re not necessarily attracted emotionally or physically other men. It feels good Having sex with a man feels damn good. We know what we’re doing. We’re active bottoms, and since we have a penis, we know our way around one. We know what feels good and how to orally another guy like a pornstar. They're in the closet So let’s start with the most likely and obvious explanation I was touching on in the introduction. These men are actually closeted gay or bisexual, but are too afraid of queer labels, and aren’t ready to admit to themselves or others they actually aren’t straight. It reaffirms their straightness In Jane Ward’s Not Gay: Sex Between Straight, White Men, she explores an irony deeply-rooted in same-sex sexual encounters among “straight” men. She claims a straight man having sex with other men "reaffirms their straightness" by showing they’re comfortable with their straight sexuality, enough so sleep with other men. It's not considered gay unless you bottom In some Latin American cultures, you're not considered gay if you’re the dom/top/receive oral (activo). You’re only gay if you’re a more feminized man who bottoms or gives blowjobs (passivo). Curiosity Curiosity not only kills the cat, it’s what gets self-identified “straight” men to sleep with other men. Simply put, they want to know what all the fuss is about, even though they’re not physically or emotionally attracted to other men. They’re also comfortable enough in their straightness to know if they explore sexually with another man once, and realize they’re not super into it, they’re not gay or bi. It reaffirms their masculinity Again, in Jane Ward’s book, she shows in “grinning and taking it” you (as a straight man) are reaffirming your manhood and masculinity. You’re proving you can overcome the physical pain of anal penetration and the “grossness” of orally servicing another man. Opportunity This is a fact of life: It is very easy have a casual, no strings attached, same-sex hookup. Hookup apps make it ridiculously simple, but if you, as a straight man, have too much guilt going online, you can always go the sauna at any YMCA or go to a gay bathhouse. If you are a “straight” man who wants to ejaculate ASAP, it’s easier to find a man (than a woman) who will you right away. |
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I thought this was very helpful and true
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9/5/2019 12:42 pm |
Good read!
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The reason? They are not "Straight guys" they are "Gay guys". They just haven't figured it out yet.
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