Why Am I Here?  

Red_Elf 46F
675 posts
5/25/2017 5:42 pm
Why Am I Here?

I've had a man ask me this recently, and while I wasn't impressed with the tone of his message, it, along with another set of what I felt were grating messages, the two men got me thinking. The second guy wrote because he felt I write too much and then, when I told him I didn't share his opinion, responded by implying that I don't let others do any talking, and then that he felt it was his job to inform me "what men want." Well, when you piss me off, you guys, you get me thinking.

For the record, I know this is going to surprise a lot of you men out there, but I actually am NOT on this site trying to figure out how to please men. For one thing, the men who have gotten to know me intimately could quickly verify that is NOT an issue for me. I have no problem pleasing my partners.

But I am not here to please random, strange men.

I am here to please me, and in the course of doing so, to build a mutually pleasing arrangement.

The idea that I have to be told "what men want" is laughable to the extreme.

The first problem with that idea is that men are not some homogenous group of people who all have the same desires, needs, and wants. Now, there are some culturally held ideals that people foolishly try to compete with to earn the return affection of another person who also attempts to compete with the culturally held ideals for the affections of their sex. I say this is foolish, because when you do this, you become defined by a pecking order and there is almost no one who can ever be identified as top dog, so everyone doing this loses.

Men don't all have the same desires, AND I don't do this.

Secondly, men are the greatest threat to my well-being in existence. If anything, as a rational human, I should be working to distance myself from men, or at least, be a lot more focused on distancing myself from the wrong men than worrying about pleasing men I have no interest in.

I actually work fairly hard to screen out the men I know will be problematic and aren't worth my time. I do a relatively good job with this. THAT'S a high priority for me.

Thirdly, by worrying about "what men want," I will be putting my needs, wants, and desires second, and why the hell would I do that?

I'm here because I am learning to put MY needs, wants, and desires FIRST after having someone completely diminish every single one that I had over time until my life was no longer my own. WHY would I be worrying about what MEN want?

Fourthly, by being my own person, I am far more likely to attract someone who authentically values me innately for who I am, not who they think I could be or should be, or because of how I stack up against other possible options. Rather than being a tool for a man to achieve his goals, I become a fascinating creature for the right men who actually appreciate that.

So, I am here because I am learning to put MY needs, wants, and desires first until I can find a man who is willing to do so, himself, and then I'll return the favor. Until then, NOPE, it's on MEN to prove they are worth my time of day.

If they don't like that? Well, they can go live their mediocre lives with mediocrity. They won't be interfering with mine.


MOST of the time I'm well behaved...but if you weren't, and, enjoyed having your ass handed to you, visit my blog and become a subscriber. There you can read all about how I am actively authoring, and rewriting, my life .

Trying to get a bigger audience? Here's my .02 Content What Content 8 Things To Consider Towards Better Content {=}


ProfPlayful 55M
3859 posts
5/26/2017 1:53 am

I only like blogs which actually say something, and yours is one of the best. If all I wanted was pornographic photos I could find them a zillion places for free.

Only a loser would want you to change. And if it's still okay to say that word, he is a loser.

My featured post this week: [post 3590688].


tedscott40 56M
2306 posts
5/26/2017 5:14 am

You'll meet a man that accepts you exactly the way you are. Then, you'll have fun and those great 2-3 hour sex sessions that you want and need.
Have a fun Holiday weekend.
Ted


TicklePlease 51F  
12061 posts
5/26/2017 5:49 am

I want to copy and paste this on my profile! Great way to summarize it!

"I am here because I am learning to put MY needs, wants, and desires first until I can find a man who is willing to do so, himself, and then I'll return the favor. Until then, NOPE, it's on MEN to prove they are worth my time of day."


lyavu 46F  
1221 posts
5/26/2017 5:22 pm

I know guys get upset when u don't have the pics they request. In the end the question comes why r u here? So you wonder r u in the site for pics or a man? idk this site has some interesting men too.


Red_Elf 46F
618 posts
5/26/2017 5:40 pm

    Quoting ProfPlayful:
    I only like blogs which actually say something, and yours is one of the best. If all I wanted was pornographic photos I could find them a zillion places for free.

    Only a loser would want you to change. And if it's still okay to say that word, he is a loser.
Awww...thank you. I wasn't feeling insecure. I was feeling angry that after I've worked so hard to reject society's notion of who I should be that someone as foolish as that dared to try to control me by telling me that "men" had a problem with my online presentation.

Like, seriously, who the hell does he think he is?

MOST of the time I'm well behaved...but if you weren't, and, enjoyed having your ass handed to you, visit my blog and become a subscriber. There you can read all about how I am actively authoring, and rewriting, my life .

Trying to get a bigger audience? Here's my .02 Content What Content 8 Things To Consider Towards Better Content {=}


Red_Elf 46F
618 posts
5/26/2017 5:40 pm

    Quoting tedscott40:
    You'll meet a man that accepts you exactly the way you are. Then, you'll have fun and those great 2-3 hour sex sessions that you want and need.
    Have a fun Holiday weekend.
    Ted
I don't doubt it. See my comment to the professor.

MOST of the time I'm well behaved...but if you weren't, and, enjoyed having your ass handed to you, visit my blog and become a subscriber. There you can read all about how I am actively authoring, and rewriting, my life .

Trying to get a bigger audience? Here's my .02 Content What Content 8 Things To Consider Towards Better Content {=}


Red_Elf 46F
618 posts
5/26/2017 5:41 pm

    Quoting TicklePlease:
    I want to copy and paste this on my profile! Great way to summarize it!

    "I am here because I am learning to put MY needs, wants, and desires first until I can find a man who is willing to do so, himself, and then I'll return the favor. Until then, NOPE, it's on MEN to prove they are worth my time of day."

You are absolutely welcome to do so. I may eventually tweak my profile to add it, as well.

MOST of the time I'm well behaved...but if you weren't, and, enjoyed having your ass handed to you, visit my blog and become a subscriber. There you can read all about how I am actively authoring, and rewriting, my life .

Trying to get a bigger audience? Here's my .02 Content What Content 8 Things To Consider Towards Better Content {=}


Red_Elf 46F
618 posts
5/26/2017 5:44 pm

    Quoting lyavu:
    I know guys get upset when u don't have the pics they request. In the end the question comes why r u here? So you wonder r u in the site for pics or a man? idk this site has some interesting men too.
Oh, I have met some. I just didn't appreciate his misogynistic pile of crap messages. He seemed to be surprised he'd ruffled my feathers, too, expecting me to have a more understanding response. No. Just no. No grown assed adult male is going to presume to know better than me how I should be in the world without a dust up.

MOST of the time I'm well behaved...but if you weren't, and, enjoyed having your ass handed to you, visit my blog and become a subscriber. There you can read all about how I am actively authoring, and rewriting, my life .

Trying to get a bigger audience? Here's my .02 Content What Content 8 Things To Consider Towards Better Content {=}


Resident_Bitch 102M/102F  
9057 posts
5/27/2017 8:01 am

Absolutely agree with what you say and feel.....




Please delete my comment if it offends.....
This is our Blog signature...do not visit our Blog as it has nothing to do with sex, and....
WARNING reading and commenting on our Blog could seriously damage YOUR status and reputation


Become a member to create a blog