loving a  

wickedeasy 69F  
8388 posts
6/4/2017 10:36 am
loving a

When you love a , it is like reading a story you wrote only the words aren’t yours and mostly you’re the editor and the reader doesn’t much care for you. In your head you began to unfold their life way before they did. You had these fabulous ideas on plotline and character…. how they will act and what they will want.

Dreams of the greatness based on what? What you didn’t get to do, what you want for them, what you think is perfect?

And each day they reached for something beyond you. In your head you’d hear yourself saying….wait, not so fast. I’m not ready. I have so much to tell you. Listen………….

What IS amazing is that at some point they say, “hey, remember when you said?”.
While it may not be exactly what you said or even what you meant at the time, it strikes you that in some odd way your presence was felt.



What happens then when disaster strikes? When the least expected thing snatches your out of your hands? I have wandered funeral homes with mothers so bent in grief that the smell of it is like metal frying. If you know that smell, you know a mother’s pain.

A mother ages in seconds. I’ve seen it happen. The inner collapse, a slackness of the skin, as if all that held her up has crumbled to dust, her eyes rheumy, not crying, seeping……endlessly. We are made of hope, eh? Without it, we have no bones.

The feeling in your throat of air stopped before lungs can expand. The knowing that life is forever changed. Yet love is not something that can be taken back, indeed it bends you forward with its power. Still, it is not blind, and having seen is now somehow, despite what you would have thought, against all the realities of the world, deeper.

Just not as clean.

You cannot conceive the many without the one.


wickedeasy 69F  
32303 posts
6/4/2017 10:44 am

anyway................

You cannot conceive the many without the one.


camperdude_69 58M
3761 posts
6/4/2017 10:54 am

very nice


wickedeasy replies on 6/5/2017 12:47 pm:
thanks for reading

spunkycumfun 59M/64F  
36125 posts
6/4/2017 10:57 am

Though I don't have children, I can relate to your post. I spend a lot of time with children and not-so-young children, and I see the future which is always much better and more uplifting than the future that politicians peddle!


spunkycumfun 59M/64F  
36125 posts
6/4/2017 11:03 am

I hope you'll allow me a rant here. But it's the second time in a fortnight that Trump after allegedly offering sympathy to those affected by the Manchester and London terror attacks that Trump has used it to tweet his warped views and policies! He's not capable of relating to the families and friends of the victims without it being about him.
Ariana Grande is just starting to do her tribute concert here after Manchester ... and now London!
Sorry I just had to get that off my chest!
I understand if you delete this in case it offends the Trump trolls!


wickedeasy replies on 6/5/2017 12:39 pm:
this belongs here Spunky. my blog wasn't about the death of my child but about something happening that I couldn't see coming.

and when we live in times like these, with such a lack of leadership here that shows empathy, that holds its citizenry in high regard... our children are at high risk.

thank you for posting this. I consider it a statement of great worth and one that fits the moment perfectly.

goodatpoetry2 69M
16571 posts
6/4/2017 11:17 am

I've never had children so I can never know the true emotions that having one brings. . Neither the good ones or the sorrow. . I can imagine that it must be so very intense. .
I'm not sure if I could handle such ups and downs. . Maybe it's best that I never did.


wickedeasy replies on 6/5/2017 12:49 pm:
I always wanted to be a mom. I don't think there's anything I've done that I take more joy in than that.

greekphilosopher 56M
4084 posts
6/4/2017 11:57 am

We bring them to this world with the promise of unconditional love, hoping and praying to leave them behind one day. When tragedy happens and they go before us, I can not even comprehend the feeling of despair.


wickedeasy replies on 6/5/2017 12:51 pm:
this is not about death for me, though it has been for many others who I honor here. for me it is about seeing your child clearly. loving while knowing.

HamburgDave2 75M
16567 posts
6/4/2017 12:07 pm

I Love my Kids and Grandkids, we can only lead by example! God forbid I will ever lose one of them

Insanity is Hereditary, you catch it from your Kids


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wickedeasy replies on 6/5/2017 12:51 pm:
that made me smile Dave.

backseatrider911 65M
49 posts
6/4/2017 1:36 pm

I do know the feeling Mothers go through, but, so do the fathers. Our son was murdered in a small town not far from us. Yes, you never get over it. He was 28, his bday is in two days, mine is today.


wickedeasy replies on 6/6/2017 12:19 pm:
I am so sorry that you had to go through such a loss. it goes against the natural order of things, doesn't it?

hugs

lindoboy100 56M
20227 posts
6/4/2017 1:38 pm

    Quoting spunkycumfun:
    I hope you'll allow me a rant here. But it's the second time in a fortnight that Trump after allegedly offering sympathy to those affected by the Manchester and London terror attacks that Trump has used it to tweet his warped views and policies! He's not capable of relating to the families and friends of the victims without it being about him.
    Ariana Grande is just starting to do her tribute concert here after Manchester ... and now London!
    Sorry I just had to get that off my chest!
    I understand if you delete this in case it offends the Trump trolls!
Aye, this..............!!

Wake up and hold yer noses.........


wickedeasy replies on 6/5/2017 12:52 pm:
ay, that.

lindoboy100 56M
20227 posts
6/4/2017 1:38 pm

It would be a lucky child to have you as their mum McWickster!

Wake up and hold yer noses.........


wickedeasy replies on 6/5/2017 12:52 pm:
and I am a lucky mother to have such a son. no matter what.

backseatrider911 65M
49 posts
6/4/2017 1:53 pm

I thought this was to be about the MOTHERS LOVE for their children, not to turn a beautiful blog into some ones twisted political views!! Sorry I just had to get that off my chest!! Shame on you lindoboy......


wickedeasy replies on 6/5/2017 12:54 pm:
not to worry. Lindo knows me well. he's allowed to say anything here.

TicklePlease 51F  
12161 posts
6/4/2017 3:22 pm

I couldn't imagine the pain of losing a child. You're so right about the reader not caring for you... it's so damn frustrating when a kid won't stay "on script!"


wickedeasy replies on 6/5/2017 12:55 pm:
grins......I know, eh? how dare they be themselves?

sweet_VM 61F  
80194 posts
6/4/2017 3:43 pm

Though I don't have children, I can relate to your post. ty Wicked a truly lovely post for today. A lost of any family member can be very tough on someone. Big hugssssssss for you dear lady.. hugssss V

Become a blog watcher sweet_vm


wickedeasy replies on 6/5/2017 12:56 pm:
ah VM, no one died. just a piece lost.

tickles4us 57M
6786 posts
6/4/2017 4:08 pm

I hope I never have to find out about that last part. I'm expecting to be a Granddad in the next week or so. My Daughter and her Husband are due to have a son.

Vive La Difference


azriel1970 48M
25854 posts
6/4/2017 7:04 pm

Agreed.......


KItkat1415 57F
19782 posts
6/4/2017 10:19 pm

I was asked recently why I loved someone so much (by he himself)...
What does one say? My heart only knows him.
My heart wants him in a way that is vastly different than other people.
My heart only sees him.
Hm, off to bed I go to dream of having him in my arms,
kk

The observant make the best lovers,
I may not do right, but I do write,
I have bliss, joy, and happiness in my life,
Kitkat
Come check out my blog
KItkat1415
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Adventures In Body Grooming
#39 April Topic Link: What Lies Beneath
If April Showers Oh Bloody Hell What Kind Of Weather Turns Me On Bloggers Symposium 40


wickedeasy replies on 6/5/2017 12:57 pm:
it is what it is. shrugs.

pocogato12 67F  
27733 posts
6/4/2017 10:48 pm

I do not have any children but had the intense pain of watching a friend deteriorate as she watched her daughter die slowly of undiagnosed breast cancer that spread. My friend looks just like your description and will never recover from this trauma

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wickedeasy replies on 6/5/2017 12:59 pm:
bring her silly things that matter little but mean everything. you know exactly what I mean dear lady. it's your heart that leads you in all you do.

author51 56F  
77551 posts
6/5/2017 1:29 am

Living so far away from my own children I pray every day for them to stay healthy and happy.Hoping that I continue to get the chance to spend time with them in my yearly visit.I phone them all once a week to hear their voice as well as message them.I can not imagine the pain of losing a child.All one can do is keep praying and loving them with the unconditional love we do...

One can never have enough JOY in their life...


wickedeasy replies on 6/5/2017 1:00 pm:
a mother is a mother no matter where she is. they know that. you know that.

HeartCollector 62F  
7626 posts
6/5/2017 6:13 am

I had a funny conversation with my youngest daughter yesterday. I was at her house and we were sitting in the back yard with a friend of her room mate. Someone brought up swimming in the ocean and she said she really doesn't go in past her knees because there are sharks and jelly fish out there. (She's been stung). Then she said she hasn't gone in any deeper because of what happened to her brother - when she was 3 and he was 14 he got bit by a Muskie at the lake inside the swimming area - first ever "recorded" bite on a human, made the news all over. She was telling her friend about it, only she was telling the newspaper story, not what really happened. She was stunned to find out he didn't have 80 stitches like the newspaper said (he got 4 stitches). It was just funny because she said she'd been telling that story for years!

The gladdest hours we know are those shared with a friend or two. Wilbur D. Nesbit


wickedeasy replies on 6/5/2017 1:02 pm:
memory is an interesting thing isn't it? my sister and I have such disparate memories of growing up it's like we lived in different homes.

HamburgDave2 75M
16567 posts
6/5/2017 2:59 pm

wickedeasy replies on 6/5/2017 9:51 pm:
that made me smile Dave.

That makes me Happy



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